Potluck

So things went well at my job interview and unless something changes I'm pretty sure I got the job. They even told me to plan on being at the general sales meeting Monday and to train Thursday and Friday. I put no faith in these words and will await the official call of rejection/offer sometime Friday.

The best description my little head could come up with for my mental and emotional feelings on going back to work is Potluck. A potluck has different types of food...some do not mix well with others, some are a perfect match...this is exactly what my emotions are. Some fit perfect with our family needs and my inner career driven self, others throw that mix right out the window and instill uneasiness, sadness, and fear as a new mom letting the daycare system raise my child 8-10 hrs a day 5 days a week.

Its the turmoil today of not knowing if I'll be back at work Monday or not, its the OMG Madison will be in daycare for 6 hrs Monday, its the what if my career groove is gone, its the what if I didn't get it and now its on to sending out resume number 226in hopes for interview number 5 and offer number 2 (yes the ratio is crap).

Madison gets a free run at daycare today while mommy sits in the directors office staring at the monitors in hopes of a better memory than day 1 with nanny #1. That memory is awful and I will be a stressed mess if I go to work Monday with that vision in my head. :(

For our families sake lets hope I got it.
For my mental health sake, lets hope Madison does well at daycare today.

Hopefully my potluck of emotions with become a themed one and start to mix well together.