Friday, March 25, 2011

How to be a Super Mom

Is there a book??? If so I need to read it.

The emotional side of putting Madison in daycare is enough to dry up all your smiles. Then there's the dogs home alone all day. They are like our kids too, poor babies. Madison cries most of the day to cope. Zeus pouts and clings to my every location when I am home. Renegade..well...she's crazy all the time so I dont' think its made much of an impact on her. :) she makes me laugh atleast.

I feel like there is so much I have to do right now like:

build up my tolerance by talking to myself about how good of a day she is going to have on the way to drop her off so I don't cry
put a big ole fake smile on all day pretending I really want to be at work instead of with Madison
it takes a TON of effort to concentrate on my job and not stress over Madison
Get home and not be irritated with Zeus and Renegade if they are uber hyper
Get home and get everything packed for the next day mentally
finish emails
smile for Jeff
stay up past 9 to spend time with Jeff
pump, pump and pump to feed my child

to get out of the house there is:
my lunch
Madisons milk
Madisons extra clothes
Madisons diaper bag
my pump
containers and freezer for milk
oh laptop, mobile office stuff, calendar, phone personal and phone work

Then oops did I do the bills..or did I not do the bills. I can't remember.
Then the does Madison need more diapers or wipes at daycare and the OMG I have NO CLOTHES FOR WORK.

And right now I'm just living the easy life training..wait til its actually my territory and I have to make it happen all on my own and the reports on top of reports we have to send end.

All while never letting Madison know its stressful, all while smiling. No matter how tired or how much I want to sleep I get to spend time with an amazing little girl that just lights up my world.

I have a great support in Jeff. I would crash and burn without him. i have no idea how single parents do it, I can barely do it and feel on the brink of insanity with help. I also have a great family to lean on in time of need.

Maybe I should figure it out and write my own book. :) HAHA!

Thursday, March 17, 2011

I wear my sunglasses....

in daycare
on cloudy days leaving daycare
in Buy Buy Baby stocking up from leaving supplies at daycare

Thank heavens for sunglasses to hide these watery eyes.

Poor Madison crying when we get to daycare and crying when I pick her up has my eyes watering something fierce and my soul feeling like its being slowly put into a shredder. The last 2 days were better for me I think neither of us sleeping much last night has worn me down to an emotional nub of a person today but lets hope the luck of the Irish comes our way and we find our pot of gold to be filled with smiles and comfort.

Thursday, March 10, 2011

6 months and counting

WOW so much has happened in the last few weeks, this is going to be one long update instead of a ton of little ones but many things happened recently.... including MADISON CELEBRATING HER 1/2 YEAR BIRTHDAY!!! WHOOHOO!!!!

With amazing teamwork Madison and I made the 6 month mark of strictly breastfeeding. I had a great partner, it was easy for us. When I got pregnant and researched the tummy, solid food and the tummy, breastmilk benefits and put all that into the mix with Jeff's family history of uneasy tummies I decided to do 6 months all breastmilk and WE DID IT!!! Many moms start rice cereal or soupy solids at 3-4 months, many give up breastfeeding and go to formula within weeks of giving birth...all moms do it different based on what is best for their babies, this was my goal for my girl and I'm stoked we did it with flying colors!!!

So far M has had green beans, not her favorite, sweet potatoes, they are ok, and one round of rice cereal on her birthday..she HATED it. If she were older I'm sure she'd say "WHAT!?! I got all psyched about my birthday dinner and I get THIS CRAP!" So glad we didn't hear that, but the look says it all. Experimenting with foods and mixing them up for different flavors is all new and exciting. She will love it soon and so will we. :)

Madison made her first trip to Las Vegas to meet her Auntie Alyssa who was out visiting Sin City for a convention. First and foremost THANK YOU BRITAX!! Madisons new car seat is her buddy and our saving grace for car rides. WOW what a difference. She slept almost the entire way there and back. The day we bought it..we put it in the car in the parking lot of the store, drove across the street and within minutes she was out for the count and slept for 1.5 hours..this momma was AMAZED! Back to the trip...we arrived at the hotel unpacked and daddy left for the strip. M and I hung out and ordered mommy some room service..BAD IDEA. I ended up with food poisoning that had me up all night and vomiting the next morning but daddy was there to help with M. We just didn't get out and about like we wanted to or get a long lunch visit with Alyssa. :(! NOTE: Don't eat room service at Hilton Garden Inn unless its the one Jeff works at ...cause well...he washes his hands when he cooks the food. :) I am forever scared of their meals. We checked out at noon. Oh can't forget to mention daddy placed 3rd in a poker tournament. After leaving the hotel on a beautiful day we stopped with M at the famous Welcome to Las Vegas sign for a photo op and then off to the convention center to meet with Alyssa. Boy how I miss her, shes such a joy to be around. Her smile and spirit are so warm..M lit up upon meeting her and I'm sure can't wait to play with Alyssa again. I know I can't wait to see her again, next time it has to be longer! Jeff and I did one more stop on our way out of town to visit Randal a friend from UCC tallahassee where we all started on our journey and where Jeff and I first met. It was nice to catch up and talk about the old days. Then we hit the road back home and boy was I ready to be in my own bed.


A week before Madison's 6 month check up and birthday we had an eye scare. She woke up in a tizzy and wouldn't stop crying the only thing that calmed her down was daddy or I singing to her and then she'd go back to sleep. She slept well into 9am in my arms. She woke up with a smile but wouldn't open her eye, then her eye began to swell and she was all splotchy (from the crying the time i wasn't so sure). We went off to the Dr...she had scratched her cornea and needed a patch for the night. She slept most of the day and at about 5pm seemed to be her normal self. The next day we went to the dr and all was fine.

I just knew M was going to get over the 20lb mark at her 6 mo check up but nope..she was 19lbs and 27 1/2 inches long. Dr said she's right on track with her personal growth chart so we are doing good!! YAY Madison! She wants nothing to do with sitting up unsupported, and I want that sooo badly. The Dr said some kids realize at such a young age that they are more mobile on their tummies and they want to get around...she also said these babies crawl fast. Well so much for sitting her in one spot, she wants nothing to do with that. We have an adventurer on our hands, guess some things are genetic. She LOVES the baby pushup position and will hold and hold and repeat repeat. Its so cute. OH AND SHE HAS TWO PEARLY WHITES!!

We are so lucky, the last 6 months have been AMAZING! Her smile lights up our souls and her personality is just so wonderful. We couldn't be two happier or luckier parents. Each day we get one more funny face, one more giggle that cracks us up or one more action that just has us rolling. She really is the funniest little infant and I hope that stays cause its fantastic.

Thursday, March 3, 2011


So things went well at my job interview and unless something changes I'm pretty sure I got the job. They even told me to plan on being at the general sales meeting Monday and to train Thursday and Friday. I put no faith in these words and will await the official call of rejection/offer sometime Friday.

The best description my little head could come up with for my mental and emotional feelings on going back to work is Potluck. A potluck has different types of food...some do not mix well with others, some are a perfect match...this is exactly what my emotions are. Some fit perfect with our family needs and my inner career driven self, others throw that mix right out the window and instill uneasiness, sadness, and fear as a new mom letting the daycare system raise my child 8-10 hrs a day 5 days a week.

Its the turmoil today of not knowing if I'll be back at work Monday or not, its the OMG Madison will be in daycare for 6 hrs Monday, its the what if my career groove is gone, its the what if I didn't get it and now its on to sending out resume number 226in hopes for interview number 5 and offer number 2 (yes the ratio is crap).

Madison gets a free run at daycare today while mommy sits in the directors office staring at the monitors in hopes of a better memory than day 1 with nanny #1. That memory is awful and I will be a stressed mess if I go to work Monday with that vision in my head. :(

For our families sake lets hope I got it.
For my mental health sake, lets hope Madison does well at daycare today.

Hopefully my potluck of emotions with become a themed one and start to mix well together.

Wednesday, March 2, 2011

First Food

Madison turned 6 months and in celebration received rice cereal for dinner...she was not pleased. :) Maybe green beans would have been better but we try those tomorrow night. Her favorite part of the night was playing with the Unbelievabowl base. Oh and her spoon that had nothing on it. It wasn't super messy cause she does a good job of taking it in instead of pushing it out, but as we go we will see if that continues.

Here a few classic first food face pictures!!